|
Buenos Aires, Argentina > Buenos Aires restaurants > Te Mataré Ramirez Te Mataré RamirezParaguay 4062 (@ Scalabrini Ortiz); Tel. +(011.54.11) 4831.9156
At Te Mataré Ramirez, sexuality goes far past the point of innuendo. From the menu names to the theatrical shows, this X-rated restaurant combines carnal hunger with a healthy sexual appetite in a surprisingly classy way. With two locations (in Palermo and San Isidro) specializing in aphrodisiacs, the deliciously rich food offerings change with the nightly shows. The entire ambience of Te Mataré Ramirez amazingly manages to transcend cultural taboos, turning a naughty topic into a well-rounded night of entertainment for all ages – above 18, of course. Marked on the outside by a simple sign back lighted in red, patrons enter into a scarlet velvet lair draped with long black tablecloths and seat covers, possibly to hide (or encourage) games of footsie below. Wall art for sale frequently changes, from 3-D cutouts of topless geishas to black pencil sketches of female nudes. The ceiling is painted to mimic a heavenly scene, replacing the usual Biblical figures with a variety of comical nude caricatures. Glass chandeliers hang around the dining area, placing the restaurant atmosphere somewhere between a brothel and a romantic dinner for two. Do not mistake the eatery’s theme, however, as catering to couples-only; patrons range from co-ed work companions to groups out for a girls’ night on the town. In fact as a word of warning for those on dates, be sure you and your partner are quite comfortable with sexuality as a conversation topic beforehand! Te Mataré has a Bossa Nova Jazz show every Monday night, “Erotic Theatre” on Tuesday nights, and “Pornographic Puppets” on Wednesday and Thursday nights; all shows begin between 10:30-11pm. Their Erotic Theatre consists of a male and female acting out naughty skits and repeating dirty tongue twisters with input from audience members, although very little touching between actors is involved. The puppet show keeps the skit format and adds in the element of anatomically correct puppets who, on the other hand, love to touch. The shows are free (with the charge of a $4AR cubierto and minimum dinner of $35AR) and really are a must-see attraction in Buenos Aires. The actual menu at Te Mataré is their signature item (available in both Spanish and English, and for sale to patrons). The pages boast odes to sexuality and explicit drawings weaved among the food offerings. The meal descriptions themselves are must-reads; from the appetizers to desserts, each item is described intimately, making it difficult to discriminate between adjectives and food names. Try their entrees for $34-48AR, such as the “Shameless and Volcanic, He Conquered Me with Obscene Words,” a candied lamb stuffed with eggplant, sun dried tomatoes, and parmesan cheese. For a sea-inspired dish, try “While Wet and Disturbed, Free and Obscure Excesses Spring Up in Her,” a Pacific salmon served with fried tofu and vegetables. Salads, such as “My Tongue on the Frontiers of Your Mouth,” consisting of wild deer, goat cheese, and truffles, are available for $22-38AR. Their appetizers, for $24-52AR, include lobster legs wrapped in bacon and Asian chicken lollipops. Finally their decadent desserts, like chocolate fondue and banana flambé, range from $12-28AR. While the no-holds-barred approach to sexuality of Te Mataré Ramirez may seem over the top, their menu states their broader mission best: “to activate the most daring part of our imagination, which is the most powerful aphrodisiac we have knowledge of.” —Te Mataré Ramirez review by Jennifer Roglà
|
